Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry hippychic7995 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(212): View more from New York

we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady

Fav 7 2287 852
share tweet
(314): View more from Missouri

No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.

Fav 9 4291 1130
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(253): View more from Washington

Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'

Fav 37 6619 1109
share tweet
(541): View more from Oregon

Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.

Fav 10 4276 1850
share tweet
(609): View more from New Jersey

This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.

Fav 30 7600 1593
share tweet
(816): View more from Missouri

She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.

Fav 19 2188 5870
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(302): View more from Delaware

when are you leaving homes?

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51

(302): View more from Delaware

I had a sex dream about Oprah.

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

go back to sleep

(302): View more from Delaware

dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.

Fav 16 1739 5761
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.

Fav 2 1660 721
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI

Fav 0 34 13
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT