you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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