i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
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