Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
