Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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