She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Randomize
