I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
