Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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