lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
