In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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