Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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