bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
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