Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
