butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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