Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
