My first STD was from a foam party
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
tonight lets celebrate not being married
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
So. Much. Porn.
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