So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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