She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
