Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
