so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize