so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
