I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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