I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
meet me or not, i'm out of control
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize