Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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