may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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