The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
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In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
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On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂