Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.

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  (847): Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part. http://tfl.nu/ui2p
  Replies (15) Good night (600) Bad night (1335)
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  (209): View more from California

  Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.

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  (209): Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball. http://tfl.nu/0g16
  Replies (13) Good night (1334) Bad night (1859)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.

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  (317): Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube. http://tfl.nu/etlx
  Replies (16) Good night (5318) Bad night (1381)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  His apartment number was 69. I had to.

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  (214): His apartment number was 69. I had to. http://tfl.nu/cn9s
  Replies (22) Good night (8196) Bad night (1088)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.

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  (703): At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina. http://tfl.nu/dkbw
  Replies (24) Good night (1605) Bad night (3076)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.

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  (415): Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league. http://tfl.nu/kjpn
  Replies (3) Good night (2265) Bad night (873)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?

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  (508): Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed? http://tfl.nu/6lho
  Replies (10) Good night (2161) Bad night (853)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.

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  (248): Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real. http://tfl.nu/avlt
  Replies (15) Good night (2583) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You need to be more adventurous.

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way

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  (402): You need to be more adventurous. (1-402): I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way http://tfl.nu/a4mr
  Replies (4) Good night (1628) Bad night (594)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf

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  (425): Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf http://tfl.nu/epw3
  Replies (4) Good night (407) Bad night (381)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not

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  (912): I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not http://tfl.nu/o8dj
  Replies (5) Good night (597) Bad night (351)
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  (858): View more from California

  But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.

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  (858): But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me. http://tfl.nu/68kv
  Replies (11) Good night (946) Bad night (419)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert

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  (727): Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert http://tfl.nu/aye6
  Replies (5) Good night (583) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.

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  (409): It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm. http://tfl.nu/laz7
  Replies (1) Good night (393) Bad night (196)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision

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  (214): In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision http://tfl.nu/s7qw
  Replies (0) Good night (353) Bad night (206)

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