That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
