Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
