look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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