Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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