Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face