rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
