This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
