He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
