Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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