remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
