thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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