she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
