And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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