My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
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No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He keeps bees of course he's weird
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Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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