you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
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