I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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