She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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