No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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