People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
