I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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