You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
we have pet lesbian snakes
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
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