Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
