i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
