I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
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